Pork.

This post is a response to "a friendly challenge".

If there's any assumption of the members of Cocaine Corn doesn't like anything at all. Those who've made such assumptions, are dickheads.

Dickhead.

We don't hate the world. We don't listen to emo.

WHY!? WHY AM I SUCH A PUSSY!? SOB!

I love Pork. So does The Hammer, The Lazer and everyone else with a brain.

Nothing spells holy more than Pork. Pork is a gift from the Gods, a gift to mankind that cures everything. Pork has the holy, powerful ability to make one happy and smart. The sheer amazing texture of the meat, coupled with unlimited possibilities achieved with different culinary expertise, Pork is without a doubt the one way ticket to heaven... and back.

Pork is the greatest meat of all. No meat can challenge the brilliance that is Pork, created by the Gods finest and holiest thoughts in their minds. They stuffed all the goodness into an animal which we know as the pig. Pork is a necessity, especially to Chinese people. Every self worthy Chinese MUST EMBRACE pork. It's not just a dish, it's a PASSION, its like sex for the mouth.

Fellatio?

If you disagree, suck my Pork filled balls.

Bullshit! Pork is just like every other meat you say? Then you need to go to your respectful gods and seek forgiveness for you have sinned, and spend your time after death having threesome sex with Satan and Saddam Hussein. If you believe in no god, then call yourself a vegetarian and/or a pussy for not appreciating the best meat in the world. No one's life is complete without Pork. So if you have the chance(s), EMBRACE and appreciate your Pork, for there are people out there, dreaming to even just smell the aroma from the holy meat.

Wonder what's inside...

People who cannot indulge in the genius that is Pork are often very cranky wombles. And you know how cranky bitches deal with their problems.

Take the biggest criminal the world has ever known. Adolf Hitler. He single handedly killed more circumcised people with beards than any other badass in the history.

There could only be two reasons:

1) His shaver is broken
2) He hadn't enjoyed decent Pork.

Let face it, Germans can make good cars, not good food. Germans Pork is generally different, okay maybe not all bad, some german Pork are fucking awesome, for Pork is fucking awesome. Some however, not so appealing, like meat dildos.

Oversized meat dildos - Product of Deutschland.

As a result of such catastrophe that is no decent Pork, Adolf Hitler has became a very cranky man and gassed a sea of Jewish hairy faces with big noses. The fact that the Jews don't eat pork either didn't help.

Another fine example is the Allah loving Osama bin Laden. Deprived of the goodness of the holy meat, bin Laden had nothing to lose.

allah huakhbar!

Al Qaeda couldn't spend on Pork, so they buy weapons. =(

I adore Pork. My Chinese blood drives my passion for the best meat in the world. Bullshit health fanatics blutter a blackman bukakke cumload of rubbish insisting that having too much meat is bad for health. I say, fuck you. Look, we're all going to die anyways, why not enjoy before we bite the dust? You have the risk of kicking the bucket anytime. Maybe get ass raped by an Indonesian gay and get killed by AIDS, or board a plane with north korean terrorist, sacrificed to a spaghetti god by a cult, zombie apocalypse or whatsoever. So eat Pork. Don't substitute Pork with beef.

This is my friend Chain before he eats beef, then after he ate beef.

Medium well anyone?

Then, this is me before the holy meat and after the holy meat.

Pork makes me happy.

Yes, Pork is indeed the happy meat. Anyone who feels Pork flowing in their veins will always have a holy scene in mind.

Buddhist sees buddha's smile.



Christ lovers see jesus himself.

The last very delicious pork buffet supper.

Muslims sees...


Right... my bad.

So many styles, so many taste, so much happiness. Pork can be served in so many ways, from the east to the west. For western pork, look up Euro Deli, 3 or 4 branches in Malaysia. Euro deli products can also be found in your nearest non-halal and/or holy store.

Better still, Chinese people have mastered the art of pork culinary.

From small delights,

Siew Long Bao

Char Siew Bao.

and all sorts of Dim Sum.

to noodles

Pork noodles

lard and Pork strips in hokkien noodles

to powerful soup

猪肚汤

Bak Kut Teh

to brilliantly satisfying big bites.

Siew Yok & Char Siew

suckling Pig

It is one's destiny to savour them all, and gain true enlightenment. Upon completion of the quest, we rise to the heavens and have bottomless supplies of Siew Yok with god.

Other meats are inferior to Pork. Substitution attempts are stupid. Chick kut teh is a sin. False meat is a sin. Should you try to replace the holy meat, Satan will devour your nipples in bed... in hell... with Saddam.... and a German meat dildo....

Pork kicks ass. Period.

Junster's Tip of the Day: PPPPOOOORRRRKKKKK!!!!!

Pork enthusiast,
The Junster